Richard’s Personal Blog

Дорогая Aня,

Большое спасибо за то время, что ты провела вместе с нашей семьей. Мы очень надеемся, что весь этот опыт был таким же удовольствием для тебя, каким он стал для нас!

В отличие от других семей, у которых были в запасе недели или даже месяцы, чтобы подготовиться, мы получили запрос от агентства всего за три дня до твоего приезда! И мы сразу ухватились за такую возможность! Когда они показали нам список детей, которые приезжают, мы сразу выбрали тебя, потому что чувствовали, что мы очень хорошо подойдём друг другу. И мы не ошиблись!

Но, поскольку всё это было было для нас очень неожиданно, мы, к сожалению, не очень хорошо успели подготовиться… ты это, конечно, заметила; мы не сразу смогли найти необходимые продукты, не успели выучить хотя бы несколько важных русских слов… даже не успели купить русско-английский словарь. Даже Cortney (к нашему удивлению) потратила эти три дня почти целиком на уборку своей комнаты, чтобы у тебя было удобное место для жилья! Мы узнали много нового от тебя и о тебе за время твоего визита, и мы всегда будем благодарны тебе за это.

К сожалению, из-за того что мы были такими новичками во всём этом, и потому, что другие семьи выразили личный к тебе интерес, агентство взяло с нас обещание - даже в письменной форме - что мы не будем пытаться тебя удочерить. Ни сейчас, ни когда-либо в будущем. Мы всё время переживали из-за того, как агентство тебе сообщило об этом факте - в машине, по пути к нашему дому, после того, как ты только что перенесла этот долгий и утомительный перелёт из Украины. Нам было очень больно слушать про то, что “свет погас в твоих глазах”, когда тебе рассказали эту новость. Мы понимаем, как это было тяжело для тебя, но мы очень надеемся, что ты сможешь понять, что мы открыли для тебя наши сердца и двери так широко, как только был возможно в данных обстоятельствах.

Позже, как только мы узнали тебя поближе, мы стали сожалеть о данном нами обещании ещё больше. Ты такая чудесная, нежная девочка, с весёлой, сердечной натурой, которую ты порой пыталась безуспешно спрятать, что мы все просто не могли в тебя не влюбиться. Поэтому мы испытывали смешанные чувства, когда отправляли тебя в другую семью: восторг оттого, что ты, как мы надеемся, получишь возможность стать частью хорошей семьи здесь, в США; и немного эгоистичную грусть оттого что ты оставляешь нас.

Мы надеемся, что исполнится всё то, чего ты хочешь и по настоящему заслуживаешь. Мы тебе желаем всего самого лучшего! Независимо от того, как Судьба может распорядиться каждым из нас в будущем, ты всегда будешь встречена в нашем доме распростёртыми объятьями, где бы мы или ты в тот момент не находились. Если тебя удочерит какая-то семья здесь, в Америке, мы хотели бы поддерживать с тобой отношения, как часть твоей “расширенной” семьи. Если же случится так, что ты, уже став совершеннолетней, все еще будешь в Украине, и захочешь уехать, пожалуйста дай нам знать, и мы сделаем всё что сможем, чтобы помочь тебе. Наш дом всегда – твой дом.

Ещё раз, спасибо за то, что подарила нам свою любовь и сделала наши жизни богаче. Да пребудет с тобой божье благословение!

С любовью — Ричэрд, Ким, Кортни, и Стэрлинг

Dear Anna,

Thank you very much for staying with our family. We can only hope that the entire experience was as rewarding for you as it was for us!

Unlike other families that had weeks or even months to prepare, we had only heard of the request for help from the agency three days before your arrival. Hearing that, we jumped at the chance! When they presented us with a list of the children that were available, we specifically picked you because we felt you would be a great match to our family. And we were right!

Because the idea of hosting any child was unexpected, we were unfortunately a bit unprepared, as you no-doubt realized; it took us a while to get the right foods, learn a few important words, or even think to buy a Russian-English dictionary. Even Cortney surprisingly spent most of the three days cleaning her room so you would have a comfortable place to stay! We learned a lot from you and about you during your visit, and we will always be grateful for that.

Before we agreed to host any child, we had to sign a contract that indicated we were not considering adoption. We were always bothered by the way the agency presented that fact to you – letting you know in the car on the way to our house after you had just undergone that long and tiring flight from the Ukraine. It was so painful to hear that “the light had gone from your eyes” when you were given the news. We know that it was very difficult for you, and we hope you can understand, realizing that we opened our hearts and home to you as wide as possible given the circumstances.

You are such a wonderfully sweet girl, with a funny, warm personality that you sometimes tried yet failed to hide, it was easy for us all to fall in love with you. So it was with mixed emotion that we sent you to another family; ecstatic that you would hopefully have the opportunity to become part of a true family here in the United States, and a little selfishly sad that you were leaving us.

We all hope you receive what you desire, and what you so rightly deserve. We wish nothing but the best for you. No matter what Fate may bring to any of us, you will always be welcome in our hearts and home with open arms, wherever we or you may be. If you are adopted by a family here in the United States, we would love to stay in touch with you as part of your extended family. If, instead, you later find yourself as an adult still in the Ukraine and you wish to leave, please contact us and we will do whatever we can to help. Our home is always yours.

Again, thank you, for sharing your love and enriching our lives.

With love — Richard, Kim, Cortney, and Sterling

More excerpted news:

I have to tell you that we saw the biggest smile on Anna’s face ever when we picked her up at 8 PM last night from junior high youth group. She was totally stoked with the group, the message, the fun (they have a skate board ramp in their room), the cute, young pastor (married, of course), etc. The girls were very nice to her; we have a very cool youth group. Since the weather was cold and drizzly and because of her cold, we decided to pass on Disneyland but we took her to the Disney Store in one of the largest shopping centers in the country, saw the Christmas decorations, had lunch and much fun. She is resting now; we have had a busy week and she has been getting up early because of our schedule. She is taking a much needed rest but said she wants to go in the jacuzzi again later.

Well, thanks to the email updates and the accompanying photos, it certainly looks like Anna is doing well. She’s got her own room with a very nice, ornate four-poster, her room looking ready to be personalized by her. The backyard looks great with a swimming pool, jacuzzi, bar area, and even a loosely thatched grass umbrella for shade. Can’t tell if there’s a big grill there; if so, maybe they can adopt me, too!

I’m hoping that the family is a fit; sounds like they might be. I have a few minor misgivings about their age and ability to cope with the stressors of her life over the next five to seven years. She is very independent by nature and they clearly have voiced a preference for independence, but I fear that Anna will require more dependence than they (or even she) will have the capacity to recognize, and only to increase over time. Other than that, everything seems golden!

We all do the best we can. I hope by assisting her potential new family as much as I can that the directive placed upon me by God will be satisfied.

(Unless you know me, you have no idea how strange it is for me to write or even think that.)

This note from Karen just in! (excerpted as before, since some of other things said just aren’t any of your business)

She wanted to play golf so we all went to the range at the Club; I of course am not able to do much because of my feet but she and Henry had a great time and she has the potential of being a good little golfer. She is now swimming in the pool and going down the slide and in the jacuzzi with Henry; unfortunately I cannot participate in that either. It’s kind of a bummer for me in my condition but I am around and participating when I can; she and Henry are having a great time!

A recent note from one of the program directors choked me up a bit:

Your generosity and kindness to that girl is truly amazing and inspiring… I hope that you know how grateful I am for that.

It was not for them that I have done anything. All I have done with regards to the children and the adoption program, I have done for Anna.

Looks like Aня is doing quite well in Southern California. I will be completely devastated if she is not able to find a compatible adoptive family, so my hopes are set on this couple.

Excerpt of a note from potential parent, Karen, to me:

One of our planned stops is a trip to the nail salon, so I’m glad you mentioned that. She slept well and really likes her room. Henry has introduced her to pool (we have a pool table upstairs in the bonus room) and she is up here now playing; it’s like a new toy for her and she loves it. She seems very happy so far.

Excerpt of a note from Karen to one of the program directors, who sent me a copy:

Anna and Henry and I are doing great! We had a fun day yesterday. Henry has taught her how to play pool, she got her feet wet in our pool, she lilkes [sic] to color and she loves our dog Gidget. She picked apples and we made applesauce and spaghetti for dinner. She is a lovely, sweet, kind girl. We’ve only been together one day but she feels at home, loves her room and our house, and we all get along very well.

Hoping…